Friday, October 06, 2006

Give me a break!

Just because something isn't a sin doesn't mean it isn't tacky and stupid! The following is a "teaching aid" for congregations -


Fire Bible

When was the last time your class saw how "HOT" God's Word is? Open this authentic looking "bible" and begin to share the scripture for the day as real flames are seen coming from your "bible". This full size book comes with a battery operated ignition system. All you supply are the batteries, lighter fluid and composure as your class gets excited. (special note: Fed-Ex shipping is available if you absolutely have to have the Fire Bible for this Sunday!)

Only $44.95!

7 comments:

megumi said...

Maybe you could use it as a lighter to light your cigars while you preach from the pulpit!!! woo hoo Secondary cigar smoke for all!

John said...

Now there is an idea! We could sell cross-shaped cigar cutters in the back of the church called "Cross-cutters." Furthermore, we could sell cigars shaped like huge nails. We could call them - "Stigmata Stogies!"

We could use them as outreach tools of course. No one is reaching out to the smoking communities, and they need to be reached too! Right!

Additionally, the money gained from such an endeavor could be used for the deacons fund. Of course, we would get our cut too!

Jack said...

Hey Brother,

I already preach with a lot of fire. I don't need real flames shooting out of my Bible. Do they sell anything to get flames coming from your mouth. That'd be more my style.

-Jack

John said...

LOL - I heard that, bro!

godgivensmile said...

I see that you use the New Heretical Version of the Bible as well!

Stuart said...

y'all are crazy!

godgivensmile said...

*insert upside down question mark here*Si', el punto, Stuart?